I’m sitting here with Former Roomie’s kids, watching planet earth II, wondering what I am going to do with my life in 2018. A few things are for certain: I’m quitting smoking, first of all. I quit for a few weeks in Just Say November, and actually felt pretty good. I’d like to do that again on a longer timeline. I have a few cigarettes left and I’m going to smoke them slowly, ease myself into quitting. Any support I can get for this difficult task is more than welcome. I really don’t have an excuse for not acing this test of self control, and everything to gain.

The truth is that I am intensely addicted to smoking, and I don’t want to give it up. It’s so god damn pleasurable. But it’s going to kill me if I don’t quit. I’m not ignorant to the dangers of smoking, I just haven’t willed myself properly to acknowledge them. I’ve been living in a world where I can smoke and feel good about being ‘independent ‘…whatever, I can’t afford to buy cigarettes anyway, so I might as well get used to doing without.

Isn’t that cross-stitch above delightful? Sister gave it to me for Xmas, and it’s perfect. I love it so much, and only she could gift it as perfectly as she did. That’s right. Two times perfect.

Mom got me a Fitbit for Xmas, and I’ve not yet made good use of it except for my sleep schedule. I also plan on making a workout schedule, but I’m waiting on inspiration to strike on what to do to get in shape. I want it to be fun, but I also want it to shed serious pounds. The later holidays were unkind to my waistline, I basically ate every time I was hungry, bored, interested in delicious food….you see how these things happen.

God, quitting smoking and dieting. I’m Bridget Jones. Bridget Jones without the insane popularity. Or the ability to blog daily.

Wish me luck, loyal reader.